Oh! New arrivals, Eh?
by Oh Inverted World x
Summary: Jessica POV! Cullens first day, 'cept a little different... I like to think this story is funny.. but then again i am twisted. Jess has a dirty mind! Oh P.S Edward and OC ARE NOT romantic! Tell me what you think, seriously! Review! yaa yaa yaahh COMPLETE
1. Newbies

**Chapter 1: Newbies**

Monday Mornings were always a drag. But not today. Hoe no. Rumour had it that Fork's newest doctor had six adopted kids (Six? Come on! Who the hell adopts SIX teenage children? Seriously, who does that?!) and they were all starting Forks High today. I heard it from Lauren, so it must be legit.

So anyways, I made an extra effort to look hot today, I straightened my hair and did my make-up more carefully. I wore that tight pink sweater that the boys go gaga for, the one that has the plunging neckline and showed just how amazing my boobs were, and wore a mini skirt that showed off my great legs.

I had to make an awesome impression, to let them know that it was I, Jessica Stanley, that was Queen Bee around here.

I was the most popular girl in school, and I could have any boy I wanted. Jealousy is a disease, bitches, get well soon.

So I drove to school, and parked my car up front in my usual spot. As soon as I was parked and got out, my posse were by my side. Lauren, Mike, Angela, Tyler and Katie. Katie wasn't really in the posse, she was more of a tag-along. We went and sat at the benches, because it was a good day. Well, a good day for Forks. Dry, yet overcast.

"OMG, Dr. Cullen's kids are starting today," Lauren sneered, "I bet they're all freaks! I mean, six adopted children? Pur-lease! I bet they have issues." Good to know me and Lo were on the same wave-length today.

"I don't know…" Angela piped up. "They might be really nice…" Stupid, naïve Angela.

"Oh shut it, Angela," Lauren snapped. "No-one asked you."

Suddenly, my attention was grabbed by two unusual cars pulling up in the student lot.

The first was a red convertible, with tinted windows. Wow, what a hot car, I couldn't help but think. The second was a monster jeep, complete with crash bar and even a spotlight. They looked WAY out of place in a place like Forks.

"That must be the Cullens," Lauren muttered, "Show offs…"

Out of the convertible, came a tall blonde beauty queen. Immediately when I saw her, I knew she was most likely going to try and replace me as most popular girl. Keep dreaming, bitch, people love me WAY too much for any of that crack.

Next, out came a blond sex-god, he was tall and mysterious, with a gorgeous honey coloured mop of wavy hair, and OH MY GOD! He SO took my breath away. I didn't think I'd ever seen anyone THAT hot ever before in my life. That was, until I saw a sexy bronze-haired boy get out of the back of the jeep. The moment I saw him I knew that he would be mine. My attention flickered momentarily back to my friends. They were all staring at the New Kids with open mouths. I don't think any of us had expected these. I looked back at the convertible where the blond boy was opening the door for a small black haired girl. Eww. A little emo weirdo. She looked like a total freak, no way deserving of that man-god next to her.

Then, from the other side of the jeep, came this seriously muscled dude. The words 'Roid Monkey' immediately came to mind. He opened the passenger door of the jeep, and helped another small girl out. She had light blond hair, but she definitely wasn't as pretty as the other blond. Just shorter. Maybe they were sisters. I'm going to have to do something about them, or maybe just the pretty one, I mused darkly. Maybe throw acid in their faces after school…

"Holy fuck…" Mike muttered. I felt my hatred for the newcomers growing rapidly. It was almost a relief when Roid Monkey left the small blonde with a nod and went to put his arm around the tall Plastic Fantastic blond. If she was taken, none of the guys would go near as long as Roid Monkey was around, and focus more on me.

"OH MY GOD!" I exclaimed. "That is like SO sick! They're all going out with each other!"

"Yeah, that's total incest." Lauren agreed. "The Hulk and Barbie are SO a thing," she said nodding towards them, and made gagging noises when they started making out n the hood of the jeep. "And Pixie Freak and Hot Stuff look pretty serious, too, " she added, her eyes fixed on the two, leaning against the convertible, his arm around her, looking each other in the eyes lovingly. Barf. "I wonder if Short Stuff and Ginger are together?" she said, looking over at the other two, who were just standing awkwardly together, making awkward chit-chat.

"No I don't think so," I replied. "They look too related. Dibs on Bronze Boy!"

Lauren looked at me acidly. She flicked her corn silk hair over her shoulder.

"Let him choose for himself." She huffed.

The bell went and we went off to class.

**Read on to the super awesome (well not really) anti-climax of the story!! Tis awful crazy (well not really) but anyways!! Yaa reviews please, ahh reviews get a high5!! Oh well, EVERYONE gets a high5!! Note this is my first story, I don't know if im any good :s Press that review button!! vvvvvvvvvvv**


	2. This Class is Class!

**Chapter 2: This Class is Class!**

**Duuuude I need reviews! oh and Edward and Des are SO not romantic btw, I'm loyal to Bella =)**

As it so happens, I had first class, Trig, with Bronze Boy. He and the small blonde arrived just at the bell and handed two slips to Mr. Varner to sign.

"Well, class, it seems we have two new students in our class today." He said indifferently, gesturing to the newbies. "Why don't you tell us a little about yourself, emm… Desie.. Desa.." He was obviously trying to read the name on the slip. "…Deseo?" he said to the small blonde.

"It's Desiderata." She corrected him in a clear, high voice, rolling her light blue eyes. She turned and smiled at the class.

God, what a bitch. She thinks she's SO cute.

"My name is Desiderata McCarty, or just plain Des if its easier,"-she said looking at Varner- "I just moved here from Alaska, I'm a Scorpio, I enjoy long walks on the beach, and I like cookies and I'm addicted to cream." She finished, and then laughed nervously.

Desiderata. What a stupid name. I wonder who gave it to her, and what they were high on. 'I like cookies and cream'? Come on! She's either really kinky or really weird, and I'm putting my money on weird.

"Okay, your turn, Edward!" She said to the boy next to her, and nudged him on his arm.

Edward. Wow. Had that name always been so… Sexy?

I hadn't noticed it until now, but his skin was a chalky pale colour. Still sexy, though. His eyes were a light golden brown…

I imagined those eyes watching me undress…Those full lips, kissing down my neck, my collarbone, my breasts, my stomach…Those hands, gently exploring my body…

Edward looked over at the blond bitch, with a peculiar smile on those luscious lips, and touched her lightly on her elbow. She let out a giggle and looked away. Huh. Weird.

"Thanks for that, Des," he said in a seductive, soft voice, and let go of her arm.

"Well, my name is Edward Cullen, as Des just said, we've just moved here from Alaska. It's a pleasure to meet you all." _I'll show you pleasure,_ I thought, and then giggled at my own witty thoughts.

They sat down at the two empty chairs in front of me, and as he was sitting down, I couldn't help but notice what a FINE ass he had. I wouldn't mind sinking my teeth into that….

I spent half that class fantasising about Edward. Him undressing me slowly, me pulling that tight black t-shirt over his head, revealing his muscular torso, me sliding my hands down his jeans… Removing them..

I was pulled out of my pleasant day dream prematurely when I noticed Edward had his hand on the table, palm up, and Desider-whatever was lightly tracing patterns on it with her fingertips. It looked like she was stifling laughter, but she could just need to pee really bad. Just as I thought that, she started shaking with silent laughter. Edward just looked awkward and embarrassed. Didn't the little bitch see she was making him uncomfortable?

Jeez, look don't touch, bitch, didn't your momma ever tell you? She was so damn rude.

My mind drifted back to sweet images of me and Edward, in the back of 'Roid Monkey's jeep, together, hot…

Desiderata burst into a sudden fit of laughter. Everyone turned to stare at her, and Edward pulled his hand away from hers. He looked a little sick.

The little freak calmed down, blushing slightly. She looked over and smiled at Edward, who rolled his eyes at her.

The poor boy. It must be humiliating to be related to a girl like that, even if it is only through adoption.

"Miss McCarty?" Mr. Varner asked, annoyed. "is there something amusing you?"

"No, sorry about that. I just had a funny thought."

"Care to share it with the rest of us then?"

"Nope," She smiled, popping the 'p' sound like a child. "It isn't mine to tell."

**So what thinks you? Press that button there, Right underneath, that says "Review". Go on. Don't be shy to tell me how my writing Suuuuucks!! i can change!! haha!!**


	3. It's Chowtime!

**Chapter 3: It's Chowtime!**

Ahh lunch time. My favourite time of the school day. The time of day when my adoring people fight over who gets to sit next to me at lunch. The time when the guys try to get my attention, buying me treats and carrying my tray. When the girls sigh with envy when they realise they will never be like me.

So I was like walking from Trig to the cafeteria with Lauren, totally discussing how gorgeous Edward Cullen was.

"Like oh my god," I said with a smirk. "Did you see how, like, muscled he is? I mean, not like his 'brother'," I rolled my eyes, "but oh my god, he is totally defined under that tight t-shirt he was wearing. I bet he does, like, all sorts of, like, I dunno, kickboxing and shit. Yeah, he looks like a total kick boxer." My mind instantly shifted to the image of Edward, all hot, sweaty and topless in those gorgeous kickboxing shorts guys always wear on TV. Oh….

"Yeah," She agreed. "And I like totally get the feeling he's into blondes," She said, subtly flicking her long glossy hair over her shoulder. Okay, she was TOTALLY crossing the line here, I so had him first. Was she like such a total bitch or what?

Two could play at this game.

"Yeah, no, I don't think so," I said, pretending to inspect my cuticles, "He has two blonde 'sisters'. I'm sure that going for a blonde would remind him of them. And oh my god! He was SO checking me out in class this morning." I looked up to see Lauren looking at me callously.

"Get your eyes checked, Jess," she snarled. "He was to busy being embarrassed by that little blondie freak with the inappropriate touching problem to even notice you exist." I felt my blood boil. Lauren was going to pay for that one. EVERYONE notices Jessica Stanley. I'm hot. But not now, I decided. I'd find some way to humiliate her in front of everyone later. It's easier to let her think she's won. And anyways, why would Edward ever go for her? Okay, she has nice hair, I admit. But her nose! Jeez you could eat your dinner off it. And could she put her makeup on ANY patchier if she tried? And those pants she was wearing today made her look like a total hippo. I smiled at her as genuinely as I could, and changed the subject.

"Yeah, what was with that?" I giggled, resisting the urge to punch her in her fugly nose.

"I know, right?" she beamed, pleased that she had 'won'. Psyeah right.

"And like, did you see what she was wearing?" I added, grudgingly remembering the simple, cute outfit that I should have thought of wearing, because it would look so much better on me. It was a hot look. "Total yuck."

"I know. Dorothy much?" she tittered.

Oh my god, Dorothy had like red shoes, not pink ballerina pumps you rumple-fugly bitch.

"I totally agree. Like, who does she think she is?"

So we, like walked into the cafeteria, totally expecting everyone to like, look over at us in, like, awe and shit, but for once no one turned a head. I felt red-hot anger burn my cheeks when I saw that all eyes were trained on the New Kids.

Whoopdy-freakin-doo. They're new, so what? Like, get a life!

They were all sitting at a table in the far corner, like TOGETHER. As in, like ALL OVER EACH OTHER. Oh my god, like PDA overload.

They obviously hadn't made any new friends today. I noticed the divine Edward wasn't with them, or the little short weirdo.

So I like sat down at my table of adoring fans, thinking he had obviously like caught some sort of like hand-herpes from Freaky McGee and decided to go home to escape her, when I saw him and said freak enter the cafeteria. He looked around, her close by his side, clutching his elbow. That girl must have, like, abandonment issues. Her parents probably ditched her because she's such a little hoe-bag, and that's why she's all adopted and whatnot.

God, I actually wouldn't mind if my parents abandon me any day of the week if only I got to live with Edward, in the same house…. Same room… same bed… I shuddered pleasantly as the saucy mental images flashed in my mind's eye.

I had a sudden flash of inspiration.

As the schools most popular girl, it was my responsibility make Edward feel welcome on his first day. He shouldn't have to go sit with his family like some loser-freak, and I felt it my duty to remove him from the literal pain-in-his-side.

I sprang up and pranced up to him as flirtfully as I could.

"Hi! You must be Edward. I'm Jessica. Oh my god, I know it's like your first day and all, but would you like to sit with me and my friends? They're all dying to meet you!" I said, looking him in his beautiful light brown eyes, emphasising the _you_ part. I really didn't want the cast from a Midsummer Night's Dream joining me for lunch. Just this hot piece of man candy… Yum….

"Ermm that is very considerate of you but…" my heart fell with that horrible word _but_, and with it the hopes of those amazing times ahead, in Studly McBuff's jeep, the janitor's closet, all of the other placed I had imagined doing it with him in…

"We'd love to come!" chirped the little blonde misfit. It seems I'm not going to get one without the other… I wonder if it is possible to have her surgically removed. Edward didn't look happy. He obviously wanted to get rid of her just as much as I did. We had like so much in common!

"We would?" Edward looked at her quizzically, and then a look of comprehension spread across his face. "Actually, Jessica, if you don't mind I have to speak to my brother about something important." he said, turning to face me. I looked at him, with a similar sensation to looking directly into the sun.

"No you don't, I sorted that out!" she piped up again. She smiled brightly at him. _Oh you little hoe, just let him go by himself, he's trying to ditch you, cant you see? _I tried to send her telepathic messages, but it didn't seem to work.

"Well I have to give Alice back her timetable," he responded, almost mechanically.

"Already done, bro."

"So I suppose I have no more excuses?" he said to her, nearly desperately. Desperate for her to leave so he could have his wicked way with me... Oh la la…

"Nope!" she smiled. "Let's go!"

"Okay," I said, giving her a '_Get Your Hands Off My Man_' look while I grudgingly led them over to my table.

Mike and Ben moved over to create space for them, with Mike sitting next to Blondie McFreakerson, then the heavenly Edward, and then finally me. I saw Lauren shooting death glares over my direction, but I just smiled smugly, secured in the knowledge that I nearly had Edward in the palm of my hand.

Oh god, I could smell him… oh heavens… I felt like I was going to pass out…

"Hey, I'm Mike," Mike smiled at Blondie-Whose-Name-I-Have-Long-Forgotten. She looked at Edward and released her iron grasp of his arm. She turned to Mike and grinned.

"I'm Desiderata. Or Des, if you want…" Once again: stupid name, stupid name! Edward looked at me disapprovingly. I decided to make my move.

"So, Ed, I hope you don't mind me calling you that, how are you enjoying Forks? Is it as… pleasurable as you expect?" I asked, emphasising certain words. From past experience, I could get a guy all riled up even from simple conversation.

"I prefer Edward, actually if you don't mind. It is all very pleasant, thank you. Des," he said turning to her, "I do believe we don't have any lunch. Excuse us for a moment, Jessica." he said, and stood up in a fluid movement. Des stood up too and joined him in the queue.

Mike turned to me. "Strange bunch, aren't they?" he said to me, with his usual flirty smile. Ah, Mike, my trusted puppy dog toy-boy.

"Yeah, but they seem really nice! Well Edward anyways," I smiled, playing Ms. Nice Girl.

"Yeah, I suppose. Hey, are Des and Edward, like.. a thing?" he asked. I shook my head in defiance. No one shall ever touch my Edward, ever! Except me, and I'll do enough touching for the rest of them…

"I don't think so, I have a feeling… nah, I shouldn't say it," I said, and shook my head in mock rebuttal.

"No, go on, say it," Mike insisted. I sighed and pretended to give in.

"Well, you cant say this to anyone, but I have a feeling that Des is a lesbian, but keep that quiet. I wouldn't want the entire school to find out. To think what it would do to the poor poppet…" I said, thinking about how AWESOME it would be if Mike started that lesbian rumour.

"Oh… Well that's… something…" he said and turned back to his jell-o with a new found interest. Oh yes, he was totally going to tell EVERYONE! Jessica the evil mastermind strikes again!

Just then Edward returned, looking sour, with only a bottle of water, while Des had a small tray of food.

He sat down, this time beside Mike, and no! I had to sit beside Des. She turned to me and smiled. "Hi Jessica! I'm Des. How are you?" she smiled, unfazed by the daggers I was throwing at her with my eyes.

"I'm good." I replied curtly. I may be a lot of things, but rude isn't one of them. She turned to start eating a banana.

My eyes wandered to look at her closely. Hmmm… I noticed a ruby heart on a silver chain around her neck. It looked total counterfeit. She had her ears pierced, barley visible through her long blonde hair, but she had green dangly earrings in. CHEAP! They screamed. Her body was very small, and very slim, but curvy, like she really did have an addiction to cream.

Just then I noticed her and Edward were touching, they were sitting that close to each other. That should be ME touching him, not her! She was weird! And stalkery!

Oh that little bitch is definitely getting acid in her eyes after class.

I needed to get Edward by himself, to talk to him. As if on cue, Des hopped out of her seat.

"Umm I have to go talk to Emmett, I'll see you in class later, Edward. See ya Jessica." she said and loped off to her family. At this point the table was nearly empty, except for me, Edward and Katie, who I glared at until she left.

"So, Edward," I said, seductively, looking him deep in the eyes and tracing a celery stick along the edges of my full lips, sexily. "Are you and Des… together?" I asked. Better to get it out of the way.

Edward grimaced at me, a good sign.

"No. She is a good friend of mine." he said and started to get up.

"Wait! I'll walk you to your next class!" I offered.

"No, that wont be necessary." he replied sourly.

"Umm.." I had to think fast. "I feel we have a lot in common, I'd like to get to know you, Edward Cullen." it was one of my better lines, and to finish it up and seal the deal I always put my hand over the guys heart and looked into his eyes. It always worked. It made the guy feel like we had a connection.

But as I was reaching out to him he backed off, and started walking away.

"Leave it, Jessica." he said and started walking to his next class.

Ouch. Rejection.

No.

It couldn't be.

No.

He was confused.

He was new, he didn't know the REAL me.

He only saw what other people saw.

I had to find a way to show him my heart, my soul… my mind.

He would me mine.

Oh yes.

He would be mine.

**So watcha think?? I think I have a way to conclude this…**

**Find out next chapter!!!**

**Review please, it would mean so much to me! Thank you:)**


	4. Ohh Nice Bush:D

**This chap was supposed to be last, but its just a filler, so yaa doesent count.....**

**Its kinda short, but whatev!!**

Oh my God. I was SO not just snubbed by Edward freakin' Cullen. No freakin' way. He must be, like, WAY confused. I'm Jessica Stanley. As in Jessica FREAKIN' Stanley for cryin' out loud! I'm HOT!

There was only one logical explanation for his stand-offish behaviour.

He was playing hard to get.

And I could play hard, baby. Way hard.

So I, like, made my way to my next class, English. Edward wasn't in this class, but his little blondie admirer was. She was sitting by herself at a desk in the middle of the room. She looked like really weird. Head down, eyes closed, and fingers massaging her temples, like she was trying to concentrate in some difficult maths problem. Or like she was hearing voices like some psychopath who needed therapy.

God, she was so ugly. I don't know why I thought she was pretty in the first place.

From the side, I could see that her nose was way bent like it had been broken, which threw all of her other features off-balance.

And those dark rings around her eyes? Jeez they looked like some serious shiners. _Who socked it to you,_ I thought.

So the bell went, anyways, one boring hour later. Edward wasn't in my next class either, so it was total shit as well.

So after last class, I was basically walking down to my car with that sexy swagger that I'm famous for.

I was re-applying my strawberry lip-gloss, when I saw the glorious figure of Edward Cullen in my compact mirror. He was about 6 feet behind me. Checking out my cute derriere, no doubt. And he was ALONE! There is a god. Edward be thy name.

Suddenly, a light bulb pinged in my mind.

I had a flash of GENIOUS.

Oh yes. I spent about eight seconds preparing for my master plan. It was FLAWLESS. I was so smart.

I made sure to slow my pace subtly, until I was about 3 feet in front of him. I would 'accidentally' trip over my own feet, cutely, of course, with a little 'Oh!', and fall straight into his perfect arms… he would have no choice but to catch me in his big strong arms, look me deep in my mysterious blue eyes, and fall insanely in love with me…

So I stumbled, and fell back a little, like SO cutely, but then something SO freakin unlucky happened. That was the exact moment that Edward decided to bend down and tie his laces (wtf? He was wearing docker shoes, they don't even HAVE laces!) and of course, without him there to catch me, I fell straight through a muddy puddle into a wet bush.

Oh MY GOD. This was so HUMILIATING. Please, I wished a big hole would just swallow me up.

And, of course, Edward just stared at me like I had just proposed to do some freaky weird ancient blood-ritual ritual.

He stared for a moment, as did everyone in the vicinity, and then burst into a fit of laughter. "Jesus Christ, Jessica…" he chuckled, shaking his head disapprovingly and walking away.

Oh-My-God. Did I mention that this was SO embarrassing? Did I?

I saw Lauren rounding people up, pointing and laughing at me. That bitch was DEAD. I would KILL HER SO HARD THAT SHE DIED TO DEATH.

I scrambled to my feet, pulling loose twigs out of my usually-pristine hair, and dashed to my car. I reached it and dove into the front for safety. I saw the Cullens, getting into their cars, laughing and looking over at me. I felt like a monkey in a zoo. All I needed now was a banana.

I made up my mind then and there.

I was never going in to school ever again.

Ever.

Never.

Never ever.

Ever.

**So watcha think?? Please I would love it if people would review after every chap cos id love to know what you think! Oh and FYI I do reply to every single review, and I love getting them :D**


	5. Happy Happy Hi Ho Returns!

**Chapter 5: Happy Happy Hi Ho Returns!**

**Okay NEXT CHAP IS LAST I PROMISE!!! I just didn't want to make this one too long, so I split it up!!!**

"Come on Jessica! I'm not letting you stay home any longer! Get ready for school!" My mom yelled up the stairs.

It was Monday morning. I hadn't been to school in about a month and a half now. No contact with the outside world in 6 weeks. I hadn't dared show my pretty little face in school for nearly half a term.

And now, finally, six weeks later, I realised that all I did was fall into a bush, no biggie.

Why had I over reacted? Jeez, what the hell is wrong with me?

I spent my time in solitude dreaming about Edward Cullen… was he as perfect as I remembered? No, I doubt it. No one could possibly be that beautiful. Maybe he was just a dream…

I had really let myself go. Like serially. Unwashed hair, incredibly bad personal hygiene, uber hairy legs, not to mention I had been surviving on Pop-Tarts and Twinkies…

_5 am. _I had three hours to transform myself into the old Jessica, the one everyone knew and loved…

So I got into the shower. I let the scalding water cleanse my skin. I washed my lengthy hair with a sweet floral shampoo, and I scrubbed my skin until it ached. When I got out, I blow dried my long soft hair with the aid of a large barrel brush, into soft, beachy curls. I did my make-up carefully, so I had flawless creamy skin and rosy cheeks. I applied thin black liner over white shadow, and, of course, put on lashings of mascara, for that wide-eyed-deer-in-the-headlights look. It was super cute.

And for the outfit, I put on my cutest top, a long, tight, low-cut one in light pink, and my favourite stone-washed jeans.

Today, I would look kick-ass.

As I pulled into the student lot in Forks High, I was surprised to see that my usual place wasn't taken. Wow, I thought. People sure love me. I would have thought that they believed me dead.

I caught my reflection in the rear view mirror. Wow. Perfection, thy name be Jessica.

I climbed out of my car, and, yet again to my surprise, my posse rushed over to me. Mike caught me in his arms in a tight hug, and the girls (including Lauren, the fake bitch) squealed over how great it was that I was back.

I dismissed them with a wave, but grabbed Angela's hand lightly and smiled tentatively. She was the only one who attempted to make an effort with me recently, and was probably my truest friend.

So I gave Lauren the once-over. She looked at me nervously, and I walked up to her, all up in her face.

"Hello Lauren." I said.

"Hey, Jess… How are you?" she stuttered.

"I'm grand. And you?"

She didn't reply for a moment, but then Katie jumped in.

"She got turned down by Edward Cullen _and_ his blond brother!" Katie giggled. My eyes widened, and I burst out laughing.

"Well, well, well, dear Lauren. Tell me all about it!"

"Shut up, Jess. I don't want to talk about it." she mumbled to my delight. It must be bad, then.

"It was so funny," Katie laughed. I was really starting to like this girl. "Edward did it in front of the entire cafeteria. Lauren was following him around, and he just snapped. It was hilarious. It was like he knew what she was going to do, and countered it. I had never laughed so hard. And then Jasper,"-Lauren winced at the name-"OMG she was coming on to him in physics, and he just got, like, really pissed and stormed out of the room. It was classic!"

I wanted to save Lauren's torment until later, so I changed the subject.

"So what's the goss?" I inquired. Lauren perked up immediately.

"Desiderata is a dyke!" She laughed. "Everyone knows it. Oh my gawd!"

"No way!" I said in mock shock. So Mike really did start that one, wow.

"Yeah. She always seems to know when were talking about her. It's so funny!"

So the bell went and I hurried off to first class, trig. The class that Edward sits in front of me in…

I got there early, and took my seat. Before the second bell went, Edward came in with Desiderata. She looked upset. Her eyes were lined with red, like she had been crying. Or kissing girls, I thought with a smile at my wittiness. Des shuddered and looked down, and Edward gave me the darkest glare I had ever seen. I physically flinched back. He had his arm around her back protectively as he led her to her seat. What a hoe. What a stupid little dyke.

**Edward POV**

Jessica was weird… why she targeting Des with her meanness? This was only Des' second high school to go to, and Jessica was already driving her away. Her thoughts had been amusing to her at first, but slowly gained a malicious edge. Her thoughts about me were uncomfortable. I felt violated just being near her. Being mind-raped repeatedly was no fun. What she wished for, the things she imagined, were absurd. She was very lucky that she didn't appeal to me. If she did… well, she wouldn't live to tell the tale.

_Oh Edward, leave that little Blonde freak alone for just one minute and look at ME for who I really am…_ she was thinking desperately. I saw her for who she was. She was a self-centred weirdo. I wished I could just stand up and yell at her to shut her filthy mind up and move on to her next obsession and to leave my family out of it. It was quite frustrating to not be able to do that.

_Calm it, Edward. _Des thought, seeing my strain. My mind may be fuzzy to her, but she could still hear the frustrated tenor of my thoughts, even without physical contact. I reflexively reached out to touch her hand, to let her hear me clearly.

_Jessica is getting on my nerves again._ I thought back, looking up at the teacher as if I was paying attention.

_Where is she picturing you guys now?_ She thought, reaching out to hold my hand to get a better look at Jessica's mind through mine. I flinched away from her.

_Jeez Edward I'm not a baby,_ she thought rolling her eyes. _I can handle whatever she is thinking. I know I'm not a lesbian, you know, Rose and Em know , Alice and Jasper know, so why do I care what that insignificant human thinks?_

I could hear that she was getting angry. She looked down, her blue eyes starting to water, a reaction to the strain of wrath. Des was weird, in an weird way, and she didn't like to come across as weak. She wanted to be tough, but failing.

_Why the hell are they holding hands? I bet she's forcing him. What a little cow. He wants to be with me, and she's being a bitch about it…_

Des sighed, and looked down again. I wasn't in her next class, so she would have to endure Jessica alone. It was a relief that she wouldn't be able to hear Jessica properly, but I knew that only being able to hear the static of someone's mind gave her headaches. Especially when they have a menacing edge, like Jessica's. Poor girl.

_Save your pity for someone who cares, Edward,_ came her reply. I looked at her and smiled, such a spunky young thing. _Shut the hell up, I'm old enough, now stop pitying me or I'll have Jasper make you think you crave weird things again,_ and flashing the memory of last time.

_Whatever, Desie. I'll tell your d about that time you…_

But the bell cut me off mid-thought.

_See ya, Ed,_ she thought as she walked away down the hallways. Oh how that girl is so weird.

**Once again, a filler. Next chap is the last I PROMISE!!!! Oh and be a sweetie, review:) please, it would make me so happy!**


	6. Planning?

**Chapter 6: Planning?**

**Ohkay I'm prob pissing everybody off with this fic, twas supposed to be finished 3 chaps ago! Don't hate me, I'm just auther-ly challenged!**

**Jessica POV**

I had to sit behind that little blondie BITCH for the past hour, and she had a serious problem. I mean, I'm a pretty good reader when it comes to people. And from what I saw with her, she was super-clingy, needy and really fucking annoying. The whole touching thing had gone a BIT too far, I mean seriously, come on! What the hell is her problem?

Bent-y nosed little bitch. She was so weird. All through the class she kept tensing up, it was really strange, like what the fuck? Weirdo.

After class, I gazed at the godly Edward as he got up and gathered his books. His shoulders were broad, muscular, perfectly taut under the tight navy t-shirt that he was wearing. Oh my god he was… perfection.

He turned around to glare at me once again before he left the room. It was a glare …of love. I could see it in the intensity of his eyes.

So I went off to my next class, which, sadly, Edward wasn't in. I took a seat beside Mike and got my shit out. Physics was super boring. It's like, when will I ever need to know this?

I looked around the room. Desiderata was sitting at a desk by herself. Jasper was behind her, sitting the furthest away from Lauren as her could in the limited space of the desk. I saw that Lauren's ears were burning, and sniggered to myself.

I looked back at the blonde dyke. A wave of hatred coursed through me, and she flinched. Jeez, she flinches a lot. Must be Tourettes or some shit. Edward's hot brother jerked his head around to look at me, with this really crazy look. One of pure lust, I would imagine. I winked and blew him a kiss, and he groaned and turned away. Poor boy was probably having a hard time to not jump me now… It wasn't my fault that I had such an effect on boys. Desiderata turned around and gave him a small smile. He just looked away. YEAH BITCH no-one likes you. Stop trying and go play in traffic.

All of a sudden, a feeling of anxiety flooded through me. I felt paranoid, and I had no idea why. I glanced over at Mike. Why wasn't he looking at me? Did I have something on my face? I jerked my hand up to feel. There was a slight protrusion on my left cheek… was that natural? OH MY GOD was it one of those huge gross spots that you never feel coming, and then when you do see them its too late? OH MY GOD I bet I looked like the hunchback of Notredam, except in my face! Or maybe it wasn't a spot… what were the symptoms of the dreaded Swine Flu that every one is going bonkers over again? DID I HAVE SWINE FLU? I felt nauseous. I was going to die of pig wheeze… The anxiety rushed through my veins like a burst dam. I was afraid. I started shaking uncontrollably, this was insane… the teacher glanced over at me,

"Jessica, are you okay?" she asked, it dawned on me. It was HER that gave it to me through sneezing on my homework. I glared at her. "Do you want to go to the nurse?"

"YEAH YOU SHOULD KNOW ALL ABOUT THAT!" I yelled. "YOU INFECTED ME!" I screeched as I ran out of the room and down the hall to the bathrooms. I stormed into one of the cubicles and sat down, and calmed instantly.

What the hell did I just do?

**XXxXxXxXxXxxXxXxXxX**

**Jasper POV**

Tee-hee.

**XXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx**

**LUNCH TIME**

**Edward POV**

I couldn't help but laugh when I saw what Jasper did to Jessica in Physics. He could feel the hatred rolling off her towards Desiderata, and he just.. Well, decided to do something about it. With hilarious results. Alice fell off her chair with the laughter during her Chemistry lesson, and I was nearly sent out to the principle for not being able to control myself.

So at lunch, I found Des. I put my arm around her and walked into the cafeteria. I realised that it must look a bit strange, so I put my hand on her bare forearm instead.

_Dude, Jess is pissing me off majorly,_ she thought.

_I'm sorry you had to be in class with her, I know she gives you extra headaches,_ I thought back.

_It's not just her. I can feel people thinking offensive things towards me, I just don't know what it's all about. I was hoping you could help me clarify that actually,_ She looked up at me hopefully. _Oh and by the way is my nose really that ugly? I wish it was straighter, but I suppose plastic surgery is out of the question.._

_Your nose has character, D, never mind Jess,_

We were silent as we walked to out table with the family. Des took a seat next to Emmett, and I sat next to her, beside Alice.

I kept a hand on her arm, out of sight, so she could hear people properly.

…_and I bet she has a thing for Alice…_ came the thoughts of young Katie at Lauren's table.

…_I heard she was with Ms Cope behind the gym during second period…_

…_got kicked out of her last school for indecency…_

All of the internal chatter of Forks high was so absurd. Des looked down at her lunch, and didn't say anything. Her face said it all. The rumours were really starting to get to her down…

Jasper put his hand on her shoulder and sent a wave of calm over her. She smiled meekly.

"Don't worry, Jessica is a grade A bitch," Rosalie said with a warm smile.

"I know, sheesh, stop babying me," Des responded. "I am old enough to take care of myself!" she grimaced.

"Que vous etes belle*, Desiderata," Alice said to her randomly out of the blue, probably trying to lighten the atmosphere, knowing what her response would be.

"Tu veux voir mon sabre laser**?" Des smiled. That was the only thing she could say in French, and used it whenever anyone said anything in the language. Goofy Des, she was never serious….

_Shut up, Ed, you seem to forget I share all of your thoughts…_ she glanced up at me. Just then the thoughts of Jessica Stanley came through quite strongly.

…_Edward is only pretending to like his family, he is lusting after me, along with his brothers, the girls aren't even THAT pretty…_

Des giggled at her absurd thoughts. I grimaced.

But her smile soon faded, as more thoughts about her sexuality came through strong as well.

I had a flash of inspiration to make everyone stop thinking such absurd things.

_It will never work…!_ Des thought. _That's mental…_

"It will work!" Alice chirped in. "It may be weird, but it will work!"

I looked Des deep in her icy eyes.

_Do you want to be normal? Well normal for us?_

_Yeah, but I don't know…_ she shrugged. _It would be… weird._

_So? Weird can be good, _I smiled.

It was weird, I admit, but it was worth a shot.

**And here's for you french-ly challenged peeps!**

*****_How beautiful you are!_

******_do you want to see my light-sabre? __(from star wars, btw!)_

**Ohhhh okay I PROMISE next chap is last, pinkie swear!!! Oh and reviews will get this baby done quicker!! I do love reviews XD**


	7. Conclusion MOFOs!

**Chapter 7: Conclusion MOFOs!**

**Dedicated to Bombonella, cos I think that she's cool XD and to all the other cool-dudes who reviewed, you rawwwwwwk XD serially, I love people who review, they are so nice! This is the last chap *sniff* I had fun with this story, I love writing Jessica, she's so silly XD **

**Jessica POV**

I was in the bathrooms with Lauren, doing our makeup. She was, like, applying hers with a freakin' spatula. Well I suppose not everyone can be as perfect as me, and be blessed with beautiful skin…

I was already totally over the whole swine-flu incident in class, I know no-one paid any attention because Mike Newton asked me out three times since that class. Good ol' Mike. My trusted puppy dog lover boy.

Lauren got her kicks from reminding me of the little eppo every five minutes, but every time she did I'd TOTALLY remind her that's she's a TOTAL loser for asking the Cullen boys out and failing miserably. That shut her up like the sad loser that she was.

Lunch was nearly over. I decided that I should make my move on Edward in the morning, when I would be fresher.

I went out of the bathrooms, to see Desideretard talking to Mike Newton. Was it just me or did Mike look a little sick talking to the little weirdo? I decided that I didn't care.

The bell went and I skipped off to class.

God, I'm like SO cute sometimes.

_**The next day…**_

I woke up like extra early, to make myself, like, hot. Not that I really needed to work to achieve that, so I should say HOTTER.

I hopped in the shower and scrubbed up. I got out and lavished myself in my favourite perfume, and then put on my sexiest underwear, a lacy pink thong and matching bra. _If Edward Cullen really was superman, _I thought with a smirk, _he'll notice._

I did my make-up extra well, and dressed sexily in a low-cut boob-tube and an ultra mini skirt. I looked so damn sexy I was having trouble not jumping myself.

I grabbed some toast and ran out the door.

When I arrived in school, I was greeted by my posse. I noticed Mike was absent, but I decided that he was probably sick today.

The Cullens pulled up in their flashy cars, as per usual. I waited until it was only Edward and the blonde freak at the cars getting their bags.

But then something unexpected happened.

I was planning to go ask to speak to Eddie alone, and to send Desie the Lezzy away on an errand, but I saw she waved at him and walked away by herself.

EDWARD WAS ALONE! What was the world coming to?

I walked over, shaking my hips sexily. He looked up at me with this ADORABLE expression, it was kind of like confused and sexy and lusty and smouldering all at once.

"Hey Ed," I said as I walked up to him. He frowned a frown of LOVE.

"Good morning Jessica," he said and started to walk away.

"Wait, Edward, I have something to say!" I gasped. He turned to glare a glare of LOVE at me.

"I know what you are going to ask me, Jessica, and I have to say you are pathetic."

He just insulted me an insult of LOVE! "No, Jessica, not of love," he spat lovingly.

Wait how did he know that?

"I know a lot of things, Jessica," he said coldly. I was beginning to get the strange feeling that Edward wasn't as attracted to me as he was before… Stupid Lezzy was messing with his head, I know it…

"Finally…" he muttered, shaking his head of sex hair. I decided to risk it all and ask him about his feelings for me.

"Edward, answer me truthfully..." I began, giving him my big sexy doe-eyes.

"NO, Jessica, I think you are strange and unattractive." He said. Did I detect a hint of lovingness in those harsh words? "No, Jessica, no love."

He walked away. I felt so used… I cant believe I let myself get so close to him, only to have my heart ripped to shreds the moment he realised he didn't want me anymore…

I made up my mind then and there. I was over Edward Cullen.

"YOU CAN'T DUMP ME I DUMP YOU!" I yelled after him. People stopped and stared at me. I rushed into the main building, into the bathrooms.

I raced into a cubicle. I could feel hot tears brimming over my eyes. OH MY GOD I was SO not ruining my perfect make up over Retard Cullen. Just because he was GAY didn't mean that other guys should miss out on my hotness.

Suddenly I remembered Mike, and all the good times we had together.

Him carrying my books, complimenting me, buying me things… we had a great relationship in a non-doing-each-other way. Maybe we should do each other… Mike wasn't bad looking, and was a really sweet guy… I grinned to myself and walked out of my cubicle to inspect myself in the mirror.

_Jessica, you fox, _I thought, _no-one will be able to resist you today…_

Its true, I looked stunning. And it was a widely known fact that I was hotter than Rosalie (ugly) Hale's little benty-nosed sister or whatever the hell she was.

I glided out through the doors, very sexily. My top was low enough to be showing the exact amount of boobage for guys to stare, but not enough to be called a slut.

I spotted Angela reading a notice on the notice board like a nice little nerd.

"Oh Angie!" I yelled at her. "Where is my Mike?"

She looked thoughtful for a moment. "I think that I saw him walking into the caf, but he looked kind of…"

"Okay whatever," I snapped. That girl SO didn't know when to stop talking.

I pranced through the cafeteria doors. I saw the Cullens minus Blondie talking in a group. Alice was bouncing up and down, and Rosalie (ugly) was glaring at her. Edward glanced over at me and smirked. I flipped him off and kept walking, ignoring the booming laughter if 'Roid-zilla.

I scanned the room for Mike. I saw the top of his blonde spikes standing over in the corner… he was doing something, what though? I couldn't see properly through the crowd.

I pushed my way through, and it was SO like a scene from a love-story, I would get through the crowds, and he would turn and say 'I love you,' and sweep me up into his arms…

I was nearly there. Everything was happening in slow-mo. This was awesome.

When I got to him, my heart stopped.

It actually FUCKING STOPPED.

I'm actually, like, a mild-tempered girl, but what I saw SO sent me over the FUCKING EDGE.

It was… it was Mike, but he had that… that THING'S arms wrapped around his neck.

Mike was locking lips with that little slut Desiderata.

That little WHORE. How dare she? I know it was me that started the rumour that she was a lesbian, but I thought that she actually was, honest… she was doing this to spite me.

But I felt my heart shatter for the second time today. I tapped Mike on the shoulder. He turned to look at me.

"Oh hey Jess." he said casually. "Oh yeah it turns out that Des isn't a lesbian."

That little hoe smirked knowingly at me.

"I know, right?" she said smugly. God I HATE her. "I don't know how that one started…" she locked lips with MY Mike once again. I gagged and ran off, and as I was running, I felt I hit a brick wall.

_Awww man, today is NOT my day, _I thought. I looked up to see that it wasn't a wall, it was Edward Cullen. As much as I hated him, he was hawt. I decided to ignore him, this post-break up thing really was awkward.

He smirked and kept walking.

God I HATE HIM, I hope all the Cullens would, like, go die or something. Stupid Edward thinks he's too good for anyone…

I stopped out side the main building. No one was around, so I decided to just get in my car and go home. Never returning to school, like EVER. There was, like, no hot guys. Maybe I should, like, transfer to some boarding school…

"Hey, Jessie, baby!" a friendly voice brought me back to the real world. I smiled at Tyler, who was getting out of his van.

I've never noticed before, but Tyler is kind of cute… chocolaty brown eyes, great body… and he was NICE! My kind of man…

"Hey Ty! Want to walk me to class?" I said, taking out my lip-gloss to put it on in a subtle-sexy-girl-next-door kind of way. "We don't spend nearly enough time together…"

_**THE END**_

**So that's that! It's been fun writing this story, wow I actually finished one!! My first finished fic XD I'm so proud! So tell me, what did you think about how I ended it? Good, bad? And oh yeah I'm writing the epilogue, it's just a short Desiderata's POV, and what happened to her after this chap :D the story is technically finished, so I'm not cheating with the whole no-more-chapters thingy!**

**I'm kind of sad that this is over, this was my first story, my baby! Ahh… Maybe I'll do another Jessica story later?? I duno. You tell me! **

**So yeah, this is it :(**

**Thanks for reading, review please! Last chap, you might as well! **

**Love always and thank you so much for reading, I cant thank you enough!**

**Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**


	8. Desiderata POV: Epiloge

**Chapter 8: Desiderata POV: Epilogue**

**Desiderata POV**

It's hard being a freak, even among the already strange.

It's even harder to have to be a freak that has to kiss Mike Newton.

Ewww.

God I hate Edward so much now. Him and his stupid plans… seriously, Edward is such a piano-okaying antisocial weirdo. I hate him.

Kissing Mike was like… kissing a fish that had been in the microwave for five minutes.

All ewwey and gross, and slimy and smells kind of funny. Although I admit it worked. No more shall I be known as 'Desie the Lezzy'. Oh no. Not me.

It's just plain old Desidereterater-something now. Oh well, maybe someone somewhere will get my name right, someday… nah, what's the chances of that, eh? I guess I'll change my name to Mary or Jane or some shit.

Getting Mike to succumb to my charm was like… shooting fish in a barrel. Personally, I've never done it, but I hear its dead easy. He was down for whatever.

I met him in the caf at nine sharp. I was all, "Yo Mike, get yo white ass over here and give me some sugar!" just as Emmett had said to say, and of course Mike arrives over ten minutes later with a pound of the stuff from the Home-Economics room. God he really is special.

I put the sugar down, and was like, "So Mike, ever wondered what it would be like to tongue-wrestle me?" (another of Emmett's stupid dumb lines), and he goes,

"What does that mean? Is it a new sport?"

And he wasn't even joking. I had my hand on his arm ever so lightly, so I could have a look into his mind, and he was dead serious.

Mike Newton is a special boy.

In the end I had to grab him, and just, well, kiss him. It was so gross. And to make it sicker, I could hear all of the sick twisted things going on in his mind.

SO gross!

As soon as Jessica had come and gone, I was out of there lickedy-split. As soon as I let go of Mike, the clarity of his teenage mind faded into the awful hum of the minds of the student body.

I'm only a half vampire. And I think I inherited the bad traits of my parents.

My family, the Cullens, call it my special power, my extra ability.

I call it my special handicap, my extra glitch. My stupid, stupid faggy extra flaw.

My birth mother was a perceptive human. She was a lawyer, and a good one at that. Well, so I was told. I never actually met her. She was shrewd, and had a sixth sense to know what people were thinking.

I inherited my father's easy going approach to life. I don't know, I never really knew him either. I think so anyways, or else I'm just lazy.

Whatever, I would go find out, but _eh. _I'll do it later.

I also got my birth mothers perception.

But I got it intensified enormously.

Her human perception, so I can't hear what people are thinking properly, only a constant buzz of their mind, an echo of their thoughts. It's like the feeling you have when you go to a concert, and you stand right up next to the massive speakers, even if the music is too loud to even hear properly, just a deafening kind of white noise. Afterwards, for days, you don't really hear things properly, you just hear a faint whisper and loud ringing. Carlisle thinks that it'll soften over time, but I don't know…

But that's what it's like for me all of the time without the clarity of someone's mind distracting me. But right now, I wanted to get the hell away from Mikes perverted mind.

Eww Mike was so gross. Washing machine alert!

I actually went and threw up afterwards and washed my mouth out with soap. The soap tasted better than Mike.

When I got home, it was strange. I sat in the sofa with Edward, he was thinking about my kiss with Mike and how hilarious it was, along with everyone else in the house. _Hardy har-har _it's sp hilarious, whatever.

We were watching some mindless reality TV show. Some girl not much older than my 15 years was trying to persuade her parents to let her move out to her own house, live on TV. They had this big fruity argument, blah blah drugs blah sex blah no way in hell blah blah blah…

But then I got an idea.

Edward raised an eyebrow as soon as I thought it.

_If you really want to, Desie, I support you, _he thought.

_Thanks. _was my reply.

I raced upstairs to pack my things.

Of course Alice and Rose were in my room already.

"You cant!" cried Rose.

"She will," sighed Alice, dejectedly.

I rushed over to hug them.

"Alice you know this is nothing personal." I whispered in her ear. "You're the best sister anyone could ever want! And Rose," I said, turning to bury my face in her shoulder. "You're the closest thing to a mom I'll ever have. I'll visit all the time."

While holding them, I could see how I was affecting everyone. I choked up.

I packed my things quickly and went downstairs to say goodbye to everyone.

I explained how I didn't like high school. They understood. I would head over to Denali and live with Tanya. I loved it over there, they were such motherfreakin' party animals! I could pose as Tanya's little sister, we were both blonde, maybe not the same shade, but we looked enough alike.

It was a teary farewell, for me anyway. I really loved the Cullens. They had taken me in, and saved me from becoming some mental savage. It felt wrong to leave them, but everyone has to leave the nest some day.

The most difficult was Edward. I would really miss being able to read everyone's mind through him. He really was a nice guy even though he was a weird loner, and I hoped that one day he'd find a girl who deserved him, because he really was a one-of-a-kind guy. I hugged him extra tight.

Carlisle was on the phone to the school to explain how I was transferring to a boarding school in Paris. Jessica will be delighted, I thought bitterly.

As I got into the cab, (I wasn't running all the way to Vancouver, oh no!) I waved out the window to my family. I really would miss them. They really were a kick-ass bunch, them.

It was sad, leaving my family behind, but I was also getting a new beginning.

I was going to join the ranks of the Succubus Sisters, hopefully, someday, if I ever get over my crippling shyness.

Or maybe I'll find a soul mate, like Alice and Jasper, and settle down,

Maybe I'll become like Tanya and her sisters, a succubus to the end.

Who knows, the future isn't set in stone.

I'll just take it as it comes.

One day at a time.

**Yeah incase your wondering who won my poll, the answer should be obvious :D **

**So yeah, that's the official end of this story, im kinda sad…. Maybe I'll follow up on the adventures of Desiderata at Tanya's house??? I don't know! Maybe. You tell me!! **

**Should I??? **

**I duno.**

**If people want!**

**So yahh XD**

**That's the OFFICIAL end now there, *sniff*……………**

**Please review and tell me what you think of it. Please? I reply to every single reiew I get, btw :D**

**Thanks for sticking with me, I appreciate it! So thank you:)**

**Love always!**

**Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx **


	9. Pokemon Cards!

Hey people! As some of you know I stopped writing, and I'm not fully returned, but I do have a little message! Okay!

If this is your first time reading this story, then you should know that this is the edited version :D since this was my first story, it wasn't so well written in the beginning, but I edited it! Yes indeed:) if you are one of the wonderful beautiful people who have stuck with me through chapter by chapter, than if you want you can like go back and check the newer version out, if you want. You don't have to!

But anyways, I've had someone ask me to do the sequel to this, as in Tanya's house, but I'd like to know if anyone would be interested in that. If not I'll leave it! Since I'm not even really back to writing yet :( but tell me what you think!

Oh and also I rewrote Mercury (you know my story bout the werewolves [not la push but real ones!] that I have!) so if you want you can check that out aswell:) no pressure, you don't have to!

Just saying, anyways.

So peace out!

Love always and thank you so much for taking the time to read this!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


End file.
